We’ve all been there. Last week was a whirlwind of coaching calls, discovery calls, work with my law firm, and church events, not to mention the usual chaos of parenting and managing a household. To top it off, our church had a big outreach event, so I spent Saturday organizing a beach cleanup and delivered a message on Sunday. It was a lot. I’m grateful that not every week is like that, but this one definitely weighed heavy on my mind.

And let me tell you, I woke up yesterday feeling like I was ready to fight the world.

No one had done anything to upset me—my kids were just being kids, and my husband, Jeff, wasn’t even around. Yet there I was, rolling out of bed, ready to rumble. It happens to all of us now and then, right? Because, well, we’re human.

But I didn’t always handle these moments well. In the past, I’d let that mood drag on and infect everything and everyone around me. I’d allow it to derail my entire day, and honestly, I was immature about it.

Thankfully, I’ve grown—and I believe this might help you too. I understand my body, my nervous system, and myself so much better now. I’ve matured in so many ways, so waking up in a bad mood doesn’t throw me off course like it used to. Here are three things that help me, help my clients, and I’m willing to bet they’ll help you too.

1. Accept It Instead of Fighting It

First and foremost, I accept my bad mood instead of fighting it. I tell myself, “It’s okay.” Maybe everything I feel like doing or saying in the moment isn’t okay, but it’s certainly okay to feel this way. I let go of how I think I should feel and accept how I actually feel.

Denying or fighting our feelings is exhausting and can become a vicious cycle. The more we repress emotions, the more the pressure builds, like a pressure cooker about to explode. It seeps out in ways that don’t align with how we want to show up in life—like a snide comment here or a short temper there.

If I ignore my bad mood or shove it aside, it doesn’t just disappear. Our suppressed emotions don’t vanish; they store up, causing an increase in our baseline stress level, which can dysregulate our nervous system and make us unwell. At a fundamental level, that’s what happens. So, I don’t fight it anymore.

Do I sit and wallow in it? No. But I accept it because it’s there. It’s reality, and I don’t want to live in denial.

2. Get Curious Instead of Judgmental

Curiosity over judgment—compassion over criticism. Our bodies are always communicating with us. So, if I wake up feeling ticked off, I see it as a signal, a message. It doesn’t mean I’m failing as a mom, a wife, or a business owner. It’s just information.

When we judge ourselves for being in a bad mood, we’re not great interpreters of the message. Instead, I get curious: Why am I feeling this way?

Maybe I’m simply exhausted. Maybe it’s a certain time of the month that affects my mood. Perhaps there’s something I’ve been putting off that’s leaving me feeling out of alignment, causing that internal dissonance. Maybe there’s an issue I’ve been avoiding, and this is how it’s manifesting. Or perhaps I’ve been working too much, and my inner child needs a break for some fun or creativity.

It could be a million things, but there’s always a reason. So, instead of judging ourselves, we should get curious. This curiosity will grow your awareness and help you make a conscious choice about how to proceed.

3. Choose Vulnerability Over Playing the Victim

This one can be tough, but it’s so important. A few years ago, I was in a coaching session, venting about something that had really upset me. I didn’t realize how much of a pity party I was having. My coach gently pointed out, “I hear what you’re saying and how much it’s hurting you. But I’m going to invite you to shift from playing the victim to embracing vulnerability—can you try that?”

It was a game-changer. Instead of complaining and directing all my energy outward, I shifted from victim mode to vulnerability. I expressed how deeply I was wounded, how alone I felt, and how unfair it seemed. That was the start of healing.

When I wake up in a cranky mood, I could choose to be the victim: “I’m exhausted, I didn’t get enough sleep, no one helps out, I do everything, no one understands how hard it all is.” And while that might be true, staying in that pity party doesn’t serve me or my family.

Instead, I choose vulnerability. I tell Jeff how I’m feeling, call a friend, or even share with my kids: “I’m not sure what’s going on today, but I feel off. It’s not about you—I just have some stuff to work through. I’d appreciate some extra gentleness and hugs today.”

Asking for what I need helps me process my emotions and keeps me from spiraling into a place of negativity.

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So, next time you wake up in a bad mood, try these three steps: accept your feelings, get curious about them, and choose vulnerability over victimhood. It’s okay to feel what you’re feeling—just remember that you have the power to navigate it with grace and self-compassion.

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