Mindset

Are You a Perfectionist? Why Perfectionists Have High Anxiety

I'm Michelle!

Master Life Coach, Wife & Mom, Certified Nervous System Fitness Expert, Somatic Experiencing Practitioner, Podcaster, Attorney, and Deep Believer in Curiosity and Self-Compassion

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Have you ever found yourself nodding along when someone talks about perfectionism or high-functioning anxiety? Maybe those terms hit close to home, resonating deeply with your own experiences. Well, you’re not alone. Many of us who are high-achievers, the ones who always seem to have everything under control, can identify with having perfectionistic traits.

And let’s think about it for a moment. These tendencies might have been with us for as long as we can remember. Perhaps we were the kids who loved order and followed all the rules, the honor students who excelled academically. We’ve always been driven to do things well, and it’s become a cycle – we excel, receive praise, and strive to excel even more.

Perfectionism can stem from various roots, often influenced by our childhood environments. Some of us grew up in chaotic surroundings, seeking solace in perfection as a form of safety. Others might have been raised in meticulously clean homes, leading to discomfort with anything messy. But regardless of the origins, a common thread among those with perfectionist tendencies is the struggle with anxiety. Yes, perfectionism is just a sneaky form of anxiety.

Does any of this sound familiar? Maybe you’re constantly told to chill out, you overthink and over plan, or you struggle to relax if things aren’t spotless. You’re the one people look at and wonder how you manage to do it all. But here’s the truth: no one does it all, and there are costs to perfectionism. One of them is anxiety because anything less than perfect feels unsafe to our nervous system.

So let’s dive deeper into this connection between perfectionism and anxiety. Today, I want to explore three reasons why perfectionists often experience high anxiety:

3 Reasons Perfectionists Have High Anxiety

1. Unrealistic Standards: We know in our heads that perfection isn’t attainable, yet our subconscious struggles with this truth. When we set impossibly high standards for ourselves, we’re bound to fall short repeatedly, leading to anxiety and self-doubt.

2. Self-Criticism: Critical self-talk often accompanies perfectionism. We may believe that being hard on ourselves is necessary to achieve our goals, but in reality, it only perpetuates feelings of failure and inadequacy.

3. Avoiding Risks: Perfectionists tend to avoid risks because they’re messy and unpredictable. Yet, taking calculated risks is essential for growth and fulfillment. Living in fear of imperfection leads to stagnation and anxiety-inducing indecision.

But here’s the good news: if you recognize perfectionistic tendencies in yourself and struggle with anxiety, there’s hope. Understanding the reasons behind your thoughts and behaviors can bring compassion and insight. You can rewire your brain and bring calm to your nervous system through various techniques like movement, breathwork, and self-reflection.

If this resonates with you, I invite you to book a free 30-minute discovery call with me. Let’s explore how I can support you on your journey to overcoming perfectionism and anxiety. Remember, you’re not alone, and there’s always a path to greater peace and fulfillment.

Here’s to embracing imperfection and finding joy in the journey.

Have a question you’d love Michelle to answer on the podcast? “Ask Michelle a Question.” Click this link, record your message, hit send, and I’ll answer it in a future episode!

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You my friend, are called to a life of fullness and abundance - no matter how wild this motherhood journey is. It's time to trade the exhaustion and overwhelm for peace and joy.  No more hot-mess express.  I've got you. 

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cool as a cucumber, ENNEAGRAM 3, book hoarder, MATCHA LATTE LOVER, growth seeker, accountability partner, and your biggest cheerleader

I'm Michelle.
Your Master Coach.

You my friend, are called to a life of fullness and abundance - no matter how wild this motherhood journey is. It's time to trade the exhaustion and overwhelm for peace and joy.  No more hot-mess express.  I've got you. 

Learn more

Let's redefine what's possible in motherhood.

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Cheers to starting your day right!  Make yourself comfortable and get ready to dig in, learn, and most importantly, take action!

You got it, Mama!

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Michelle Grosser

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