When people ask me what’s really behind nervous system regulation, they often expect some big, shiny secret. The truth? It’s habits.

Regulation doesn’t happen in a single “aha” moment. It’s built day after day, through the small, steady rhythms that either help your body feel safe—or keep you stuck in burnout. And while I don’t nail these perfectly every day, when I do practice them consistently, I notice a dramatic shift in my energy, patience, and presence.

So today, I’m walking you through the four habits that make the biggest difference in keeping me grounded and regulated.

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Habit #1: I Give Myself Buffer Time

For years, I lived in a constant rush. Meetings stacked back-to-back, hustling kids out the door, cutting everything too close. My nervous system read that rushing as danger.

When you’re running late, your survival brain can’t distinguish between missing preschool drop-off and being chased by a lion. Heart rate spikes. Cortisol floods your system. Breath shortens. That leaves you impatient, reactive, and frazzled before the day even starts.

Now, I intentionally build in margin. Buffer time allows me to move at a human pace instead of a frantic one. Even adding five minutes between commitments helps the body stay in a regulated state rather than bouncing into survival mode.

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Habit #2: I Block 90 Minutes for Deep Work

Every morning, I reserve 90 minutes for my most important task. No notifications, no inbox, no distractions.

Science shows that task-switching keeps your brain in a loop of urgency. Each interruption takes an average of 23 minutes to recover from, which keeps your nervous system simmering with stress. Deep focus, on the other hand, strengthens executive functioning—the part of your brain responsible for creativity and problem-solving.

This kind of monotasking isn’t just about productivity. It signals safety. It tells your body it doesn’t have to brace for the next interruption, which helps keep you regulated.

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Habit #3: My Default Is “No”

For years, I said yes to everything. Every project, every collaboration, every request. And eventually, I ended up exhausted and resentful.

Now, my default is no—unless something feels like a full-body yes. That boundary protects my bandwidth and prevents me from slipping into sympathetic overdrive.

Overcommitting doesn’t just drain your calendar. It drains your body, too. Each misaligned yes keeps you hustling, which chips away at your nervous system’s ability to stay regulated. Learning to say no is one of the most powerful interventions I’ve made.

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Habit #4: Early Bedtime Is Non-Negotiable

Sleep changed everything for me. I used to stay up late catching up on work, folding laundry, or scrolling on my phone. I thought I was “getting ahead.” Instead, I was stealing from tomorrow.

Now I prioritize winding down by 8:30 and lights out by 9:15. That rhythm lets my brain clear waste, reset cortisol, and restore the prefrontal cortex—the seat of focus and emotional regulation.

When I wake up rested, I have more energy, patience, and clarity. And perhaps most importantly, my body starts the day regulated, not scrambling to make up for lost sleep.

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Closing

These four habits—buffer time, deep work, saying no, and early bedtimes—aren’t glamorous. But they’re the scaffolding that keeps me steady.

Your nervous system doesn’t thrive on hacks. It thrives on rhythms. So if you’re ready to feel more regulated, choose one habit to start with this week. Your body will thank you

Related Episodes to Explore:

• Previous Episode
• Are You Dysregulated? 10 Surprising Signs of Nervous System Dysregulation
• 5 Things I Ditched to Regulate My Nervous System
• Why Your Nervous System May Be Dysregulated Even If You Don’t Feel Stressed Out
• 4 Overlooked Symptoms of Dysregulation That Aren’t Actually “Normal”

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